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Citat: Originally Posted by alison Upravo sam shvatila DA imam problem.... ...

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Nepročitano 13-10-11, 10:12   #11
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Citat:
Originally Posted by alison Pogledaj Post
Upravo sam shvatila DA imam problem....
.. hoću reći da ponekad uviđam da mu se sama prepuštam da me "gazi" i onda žalim zbog toga, jer sam samu sebe prevarila - nisam djelovala prvenstveno iz ljubavi prema sebi...

Mozda bi se ovo moglo prevesti u podsvjesno uvjerenje ; zasluzila sam da me "gazi" , jer ...sam zlocko , nisam vrijedna...?

Provjeri , imas od lucero temu o tome.


...umnozi l`se blago ,
nek vam srce za nj ne prione . Ps, 62,11



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Nepročitano 13-10-11, 10:16   #12
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By fantazy: kompromis vrlo blizak toletanciji
Upravo je u tome stvar! Ako smo potpuno tolerantni sa naše strane, onda nema kompromisa. Ali ako ima kompromisa, onda je tolerantnost umanjena za onoliko koliko je kompromis usaglasio stavove, pa je tolerancija ostala samo za tolerisanje preostalih neželjenih stavova. jako ozbiljna tema, i u vezi sa mnogim pričama, kako u vezi partnera, tako i među prijateljima ili u društvu.
A naša tolerancija nas može emotivno uništiti, ili podići ka višim razumevanjima naše i tuđe ličnosti, zavisno od mnogo faktora.

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Nepročitano 13-10-11, 10:18   #13
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Citat:
Originally Posted by teemo Pogledaj Post

Mozda bi se ovo moglo prevesti u podsvjesno uvjerenje ; zasluzila sam da me "gazi" , jer ...sam zlocko , nisam vrijedna...?

Provjeri , imas od lucero temu o tome.

Da, Da, vjerojatno se to događa.....

kako izaći iz takvog uvejenja? kako pronaći okidač tog uvjerenja???


Citat:
Originally Posted by fantazy Pogledaj Post
Onda odlučim odmoriti malo i padne mi on na pamet, gledam na mobitel nije se javio i onda ide: ko zna šta radi, ne misli na mene bla bla bla. Dakle kada je meni dosadno očekujem da me zabaviš. A zamislite da vama to neko kaže? Pukli bi kao kokica.

Baš!


TRAŽIM LJUDE, ŠTO VIŠE LJUDI,
KOJI IMAJU NEOGRANIČENU SPOSOBNOST UVJERENJA
DA NE POSTOJI NEŠTO ŠTO JE NEMOGUĆE UČINITI
(H. FORD).
pridruži nam se u bblj



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Nepročitano 13-10-11, 10:18   #14
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Citat:
Originally Posted by fantazy Pogledaj Post
Ja otprilike imam takvo mišljenje o kompromisu ali slažem se i za toleranciju.
Odnosno moje iskustvo u odnosima govor ida je kompromis vrlo blizak toletanciji (mada ne bi trebao biti jer po meni je tolerancija snošljivost bez tri točkice koje na žalost obično slijede). Primjetila sam naročito u odnosima da kompromis ide otprilike ovako.
Ajmo se dogovriti. Ja i dalje ostajem pri svom, ali evo biću tolerantan i pristati na kompromis. Nakon toga na žalost dolaze očekivanja, i mic po mic dođemo do ja sam popustio tamo zašto ti nećeš popustiti ovdje. I eto ti manipulacije, na koju pristaješ u ime ljubavi prema partneru.
Zar to nije jako jako jako pogrešno?
Gdje je tu onda sloboda? Gdje je tu volim te baš onakvog/onakvu kakav jesi?
Znam da je u svakodnevnim odnosima i zadatcima koje neminovno moramo zajedno obaviti vrlo teško ne zahtjevati, ne očekivati od partnera nešto, ali nije li tu onda upitna naša osobna samostalnost a ne partner?
Šta sam ja kod sebe primjetila što me prilično šokiralo.....Nisam u braku u vezi sam i radim, kuham ili perem suđe ili čitam ne bitno. Onda odlučim odmoriti malo i padne mi on na pamet, gledam na mobitel nije se javio i onda ide: ko zna šta radi, ne misli na mene bla bla bla. Dakle kada je meni dosadno očekujem da me zabaviš. A zamislite da vama to neko kaže? Pukli bi kao kokica.

hoće li mi Olio zameriti da promašujem temu:

davno sam čula za recept za sretne odnose sa partnerom:

AKO NISTE SRETNI U VEZI, NEMOJTE VARATI PARTNERA - BOLJE ZAVARAVAJTE SEBE DA STE SRETNI.

Okrutno?


volim da volim



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Nepročitano 13-10-11, 10:24   #15
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Citat:
Originally Posted by mighty mama Pogledaj Post
davno sam čula za recept za sretne odnose sa partnerom:

AKO NISTE SRETNI U VEZI, NEMOJTE VARATI PARTNERA - BOLJE ZAVARAVAJTE SEBE DA STE SRETNI.

Okrutno?
to i ja radim, ali pitajući se dali ja volim sebe - pitam se dali radim ispravno?


TRAŽIM LJUDE, ŠTO VIŠE LJUDI,
KOJI IMAJU NEOGRANIČENU SPOSOBNOST UVJERENJA
DA NE POSTOJI NEŠTO ŠTO JE NEMOGUĆE UČINITI
(H. FORD).
pridruži nam se u bblj



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Nepročitano 13-10-11, 10:24   #16
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Citat:
Originally Posted by mighty mama Pogledaj Post
hoće li mi Olio zameriti da promašujem temu:

davno sam čula za recept za sretne odnose sa partnerom:

AKO NISTE SRETNI U VEZI, NEMOJTE VARATI PARTNERA - BOLJE ZAVARAVAJTE SEBE DA STE SRETNI.

Okrutno?
Da strašno

Ali to radimo, koliko sam uspjela vidjeti u razgovoru s ženama mi smo sklonije tome....
Evo razmišljam o tome, i da, to jako dobro radimo.
Znate onu priču kad se žene udaju: on je sjajan divan.....
a nakon udaje (mjesec-dva) sastaju se prijateljice na kavama i već ide priča: onaj moj je.......




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Nepročitano 13-10-11, 10:25   #17
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Citat:
Originally Posted by alison Pogledaj Post
Da, Da, vjerojatno se to događa.....

kako izaći iz takvog uvejenja? kako pronaći okidač tog uvjerenja???





Baš!
Nikada ne smemo dopustiti da se smatramo niže vrednim od partnera, jer tada nam ne gine haos u životu......
kako da očekujemo da nas partner poštuje, ako sami sebe ne poštujemo?
Citat:
Originally Posted by mighty mama Pogledaj Post
hoće li mi Olio zameriti da promašujem temu:

davno sam čula za recept za sretne odnose sa partnerom:

AKO NISTE SRETNI U VEZI, NEMOJTE VARATI PARTNERA - BOLJE ZAVARAVAJTE SEBE DA STE SRETNI.

Okrutno?
hahah, pa ja prečesto bežim sa teme, gde me misli navedu, a ako već moramo da varamo u odnosima, varajmo i sebe i partnera, pre ili kasnije nešto se mora desiti, jer varanje nije večno..... a ni poželjno.

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Nepročitano 13-10-11, 10:25   #18
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Citat:
Originally Posted by Olio Pogledaj Post
By fantazy: kompromis vrlo blizak toletanciji
Upravo je u tome stvar! Ako smo potpuno tolerantni sa naše strane, onda nema kompromisa. Ali ako ima kompromisa, onda je tolerantnost umanjena za onoliko koliko je kompromis usaglasio stavove, pa je tolerancija ostala samo za tolerisanje preostalih neželjenih stavova. jako ozbiljna tema, i u vezi sa mnogim pričama, kako u vezi partnera, tako i među prijateljima ili u društvu.
A naša tolerancija nas može emotivno uništiti, ili podići ka višim razumevanjima naše i tuđe ličnosti, zavisno od mnogo faktora.
trebalo bi otvoriti temu o ovome zbilja da ne off topičarimo ovdje




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Nepročitano 13-10-11, 10:27   #19
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Citat:
Originally Posted by alison Pogledaj Post
to i ja radim, ali pitajući se dali ja volim sebe - pitam se dali radim ispravno?

Teško!!!!
Mojoj mami dokaz ljubavi je neprestano žrtvovanje i odgovor je : Ali nije mi teško, pa volim te

I onda se ja osjećam ucijenjena a ne voljena




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Nepročitano 13-10-11, 10:31   #20
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Citat:
Originally Posted by fantazy Pogledaj Post
Teško!!!!
Mojoj mami dokaz ljubavi je neprestano žrtvovanje i odgovor je : Ali nije mi teško, pa volim te

I onda se ja osjećam ucijenjena a ne voljena
Eh, žrtvovanje, i žrtva je specifična tema. Svako ko se svesno žrtvuje, za dobro voljenih, ili još drastičnije nepoznatih, je svakako dobra osoba, ali ja nikada sebe ne mogu zamisliti kao žrtvu, a da nisam svestan cilja koji ta moja ili bilo čija žrtva ima. Za žrtvovanje, mora postojati jasan cilj, u suprotnom, žrtva postaje mučenik bez ikakvog smisla... naravno ovo je jako suptilna tema, i ne treba shvatati previše lično ono što navodim, jer se lako može neko naći uvređenim, ako shvati da je njegova žrtva zapravo pogrešno postavljena računica... ili računa nije ni trebalo biti, a plaća samo žrtva......

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